Caffeine & Kitty Treats

A Grumpy Old Lady Joke

An elderly Scotsman lay dying in his bed.

While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite biscuits wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength and lifted himself from the bed.

Leaning on the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door-frame, gazing into the kitchen.
Were it not for death’s agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite biscuits, freshly baked.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of love from his devoted Scottish wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His aged and withered hand trembled towards a biscuit at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked by his wife with a spatula………….

“Bugger off” she said, “they’re for the funeral.”

About the author

Chris Blackwood

The sporadic musings, ramblings, and rants of a middle aged man who isn't exactly thrilled with the direction America is taking today. I'm extremely opinionated where news and politics are concerned. I call it like I see it and I don't mince any words. Life is too short to stay quiet.

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By Chris Blackwood
Caffeine & Kitty Treats

Chris Blackwood

The sporadic musings, ramblings, and rants of a middle aged man who isn't exactly thrilled with the direction America is taking today. I'm extremely opinionated where news and politics are concerned. I call it like I see it and I don't mince any words. Life is too short to stay quiet.

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